Text dating

The following text messages are a conversation between myself and a friend. The one who is a madam who I went out with a million years ago.

Her - Hi Louche babes, have ya been?

Me - Jolly good, how the Dickens are you? What is new in your world?

Her - Lots going on. I missed you at the party on Friday, there was a girl there who would have been perfect for you.

Me - Sorry about the party, I was away. Tell me about the girl.

Her - Maria she is stunning only thing is she has children and has been to prison for fighting before.

Me - What sort of fighting? You really do know the best sorts of people.

Her - I know, just defending herself against a guy who started on her. She used a shoe and a knife.


A shoe and a knife, I think I'll pass on this one.