As the hour of my performance draws ever closer I'm practicing doing the set to a clock. You have five minutes to fill with laughter and no more. So this means I have to make sure I have around that mark. Too little and things will get a bit harsh, too much and I won't get to finish a joke.
I got out my trusty pocket watch to time me while I marched around the front room spouting on about various subjects occasionally glancing back to the watch. I seemed to be doing okay but as I drew near to the end of my material the hand hadn't moved at all, so I launched into a further diatribe about something.
I checked the clock again, still only the most tiny bit of movement so I dredged my mind back to the comedy course to see if I could remember some of the stuff I came up with on the day. After a bit of squeezing and a quick checking of notes it came back to me. After rattling through that as slowly as possible without sounding like I was having a stroke I checked the time again. It had hardly moved at all.
I was feeling rather frantic at this point thinking what the Dickens was I going to talk about now to fill up my seemingly unlimited five minute slot.
Then I realised, I had been looking at the hour hand instead of the minute one and had actually sprouted nonsense for just over half an hour.
I really am such a spaz sometimes.
