Wednesday, August 09, 2006

I might have finally become a grown up.

I had a prickly moment last night with A. There was an invite back to her house, but I really wasn't in the mood and she was being a bit 'strange' So I ended up changing on the tube and going home instead of going back to hers.

I also said something I really shouldn't have as a way of making light of the situation. She had invited me back, but with a set of conditions. This annoyed me a bit, so I got in a bit of a huff and decided not to go back to hers - I really couldn't face the 1 hour and a half commute back home after watching a film I don't really enjoy that much. Not staying the night was one of the conditions as you may have guessed.

Anyway we didn't part on the best of terms and this morning things were chilly to say the least. Now historically this would have been the point at which I had ejected from the whole situation, had a boozy weekend and the moved on.

Today I did something different, I invited A for a mid-morning coffee so we could talk. We went to my favourite café - The Troubadour and sat down. I said it wasn't anything bad but I wanted to talk outside of work.

I apologised for the thing I said last night and explained about how I didn't just change my mind about the evening because some activites had forbidden, but that I just needed to try and get an early night. I also asked her to cut me a bit of slack because I wasn't terribly experienced at talking about my feelings, or having grown up conversations without spicing them with pithy one-liners.

She accepted my apology and was pleased that I had explained my actions. Things are good again, if cooler. Nothing naughty is going to happen for a while which is probably a good idea - I've got some things I really should sort out in my head first and she is still beating herself up about her ex. This self-flagellation is going to continue for a while and there is nothing anyone can do to shake her out of it - other people have been telling her to sort it out.

I'm not ecstatic about the current situation but I'm pleased we have got over what was a bit of a block on things (A described it as a wall), plus I've never had a grown up conversation with a girl, I tend to just get rid of them when they stop being fun.

What ever next eh?


Kopaylopa said...

Did she apologize for putting conditions on your coming over? Grownup conversations are good... but especially so if they're two-sided....


Louche said...

We had a chat about that too.