Sunday, October 11, 2009

Some facts, I suppose.

I think blogs are best when they are honest. So I'm going to be terribly honest about some things. This is in no-way connected to the fact that I'm at home and a bit bored.

1) I am attracted to the way people move, not really the way they look. Pictures are all well and good but it the way someone moves that does it for me. I think it is about the quickness of movement, but I can't describe it more than that. It works for chums as well.

2) That being said, I have a nearly fatal attraction towards unsuitable women. I really do have awful taste. At least I'm consistently bad though. I can't help myself around striking, tall, fiery but probably emotionally damaged brunettes.

3) Even when mashed I've got reasonably good judgement, anything bizarre that has happened while drunk has typically been the beginning of a good adventure. I've got a good drunken homing instinct too. But, when I'm feeling fruity all reasonable logic goes out of the window. I don't approve of this, and it has got me into trouble.

4) Something about the way I act with women brings out the worst in them. I don't know what it is, but I'd love to correct it. By worst I mean all the stereotypical mad woman stuff. I'm sure it's not all me that causes this, but it has to be part of it. I need Cesar Millan to come and show me what I'm doing wrong, I bet it's something like projecting the wrong sort of energy or not being Alpha enough. It's not all bad I have scores of lovely, extremely close female friends which I adore so I can talk to women, you know properly.

5) The weirdest things upset me. An ex once said, while breaking-up with me 'I sometimes get the impression that you do nice things because that's what you should do, not because you want to.'. That still haunts me.

6) Sometimes human behavior utterly baffles me, actually I can be more precise with that. Sometimes female human behavior utterly baffles me. If a man is being weird towards one of my female friends I can tell what is really going on with 100% accuracy. Women sometimes do things that just make me need to sit down and stare at the wall.

7) I've read somewhere that most chaps imagine what women they see in the street look like naked, I imagine what they'd look like better dressed. I can't help myself. Once I've worked out the look I'm never quite sure what to do with this information.

8) I'm not terribly good at confrontations. You know fights and things. I wish I was, when someone does something a bit iffy I tend to simmer on it for a decade or two before saying anything. On the plus side if someone annoys me I'm good at making them 'dead to my eyes', I should definitely list 'holding a grudge' on my C.V. as a strength.

9) I once took a large amount of magic mushrooms, without realising quite what sort of effect it would have on me. I spazzed out for a whole evening and ever since then I've loved forests. I don't think I'll ever do anything like that ever again because it had such a radical effect on me.

10) I don't like going to gigs. I rarely like the music, and even if I do it's too loud and I don't think it's worth damaging my ears over. If there was a quiet gig, and they played only the songs I wanted, in the order I wanted and I could skip them if I wanted, that might be okay, for a bit. It worries me that I can't understand why other people like gigs so much, it really does.

11) When I really like someone I tend to ignore all the reasons why I shouldn't go out with them, these reasons only come to light after things have ended.

12) I thought this was going to be a more interesting post when I was walking back from the shops, I'm not so sure now.


Clair said...

Cripes. That's a lot to be going on with.I wish I could be as open on my blog - but I'm going to take those points on, one by one.

1) Interesting. I like a quirky, slightly awkward gestural habit myself.
2) Speaking as an emotionally damaged brunette who goes for the same type over and over...
3) I've never seen you drunk and fruity. But it's never good, she said, thinking about a man called Justin in Stroud Green Road. Never has a name been so appropriate.
4) I can tell you what wrong is, and you're probably not doing it.
5) Hm. Sounds like a bird being nasty to me.
6) Humans are all a bit bonkers. You do give good advice, though, Louche.
7) Have you thought about getting a second job as a personal shopper?
8)Me neither. And I am currently nursing a grudge until such time as revenge reaches the correct cold temperature.
9) I only like them in soup.
10)I don't get this.You young people and your iPod mentality. I remember when you'd go to a gig and have to put up with a whole new album you didn't like in order to get A Hit at the end.
11) I think we all do. We live in hope that it will get better,and sometimes it does (I live in hope).
12) Well, I enjoyed it.

Louche said...

On point three, I should make that a bit clearer. What I mean is that when feeling fruity, I sometimes kiss people I shouldn't. It's like the logical part of my brain that says 'no this one is a mental stay away' disappears.

Clair said...

Ah, but then again,we all do that. In Vino Veritas and all that jazz.