I'm back

Yes, I know it has been a while but it was quite a trip. I hired a car (Which is excellent fun, I'd recommend it to anyone) and zoomed down to East Bourne for the wetting of a babies head. I stopped on the way to pick up a girl 'IP' (not quite in that way) in Croydon who ended up joining me on part of the adventure.

In East Bourne we met up with a load of my Brightonian pals and the new father. He was very jolly if a little tired looking and we drank suitable amounts of booze while talking nonsense. It's a bit strange to have one of my male counter-parts, who was wonderfully irresponsible become a grown up.

We drank a lot and then retired to The Bear's house for a bit more booze. I crashed out at some point in the morning mid way through watching a film with IP. We retired to our respective bedrooms (Bear has a very large, very nice house full of suits of armour and battle axes) for the evening.
Sadly Bear had to go off to work the next day IP and I were left alone watching films and eating toast. At about lunch time I set off for stage two of my quest, dropping IP off at a nearby train station.

The drive to Devon was fairly long but not too bad, I've done a lot of long distance driving and it didn't involve any strange mountains or dangers so it was quite calming really. I arrived at my mothers house at around 6pm and the relaxing section of my holiday began. I ate well, spent time with geese, dogs, ducks and cats and enjoyed not thinking too much. I also picked up a marvelous new suit (more on this later)

After a few days the time had come to visit my estranged father in Wales. This drive was a bit more tricky as I had only done it once before and then my little brother had been navigating. Surprisingly, I didn't get lost in the slightest. My father lives on a the top of a hill, down an extremely long, muddy track. It's so remote it makes the Overlook seem like a trendy boutique hotel in the heart of the city. He's house is ramshackle place full of goats and a very large dog, wind swept and faintly reminiscent of the village in Borat.

The meeting with my father was fraught, we don't really have a relationship and he isn't going to be around for very long so we have to have something, although what it may be is hard to say. We went for a drive in his car, it was supposed to be a visit to a Gold Mine ( I requested some quality time) but the mine was closed so it was a tour of Wales in a small car with a brief visit to the Irish sea.

It was weird, but okay really. I started to get a bit stressed half way through it but some how the rolling waves of the Irish Sea smashing on the black rocks of Wales was strangely calming. After that it got a bit better. I went back to his house and his new wife cooked us a rather good meal while my dad and I had a slightly terse conversation about work and things.

The tough part was reading a Macmillan book about dealing with cancer, it had a section on things to do when the end is near that was very troubling - that caused some tricky moments. Then I went to bed. I left early the next morning with out any breakfast (my choice) and set off on my way.

It was a quite harrowing experience but I had to do it. Hopefully it will be easier next time.

After that I visited an old flame and helped her decorate which was lovely. This old flame, lets call her K used to be an adult actress but is now retraining to be a plumber. I've never been one for DIY but it was really nice painting and talking, I'd recommend it as a date. You are doing something that is involving and it lends it self very well to polite talking. We chatted about all sorts of things, she revealed some real secrets to me. It was a nice way to spend a day and just about distracting enough to forget the other things.

We were painting till about 2am and then we retired to her bed on the understanding that nothing was going to happen. I don't think I've ever shared a bed with someone and been so careful about not touching them, it was positively Victorian. It was a fairly good nights sleep, we both had subtle notes of fresh paint in our hair but that rather added to the experience. The next morning I had a cup of tea and left for work (who were having a bit of a thing and needed me).

K looked lovely in the morning, I'd like to say right now that I think women look at their best when they are slightly blurry eyed when they rise. This goes for all women, the fluffy hair and slight air of lovable helplessness is very beguiling.

Work was manic when I arrived, it was like the end of days. I was stressed and looking rather rough as I had stopped at my flat only to drop off my suitcase, get a parking ticket and then take the hire car back.

It was a hard day, but it had been quite a week.