Showing posts with label jelly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jelly. Show all posts

Friday, March 06, 2009

Update from the miracle world of jelly

It's all worked out. The Miracle World of jelly realised that Jeff was a bit miffed and they have done absolutely everything they can to keep him sweet. Jeff will be getting a jelly mould, and a whole range of esoteric perks have suddenly been thrown in his direction.

Jeff is pleased by this and celebrated with some bourbon creams. The end.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Jeff's Miracle World of Jelly


Let's say I have a friend called Jeff. Jeff landed a job he is very pleased with and he relocated to go there much to the annoyance of his girlfriend.

Jeff has been getting on with his work very well. Directly because of his actions jelly sales are up when the global sales of wobbly food are down, massively so.

Jeff has also made some changes to the way jelly is made so that now far more jelly is being churned out and it's the best jelly there has ever been. Jeff, and his employers know this because Jeff made some changes to blueberry jelly and then suddenly blueberry jelly sales are up 40%, in a week! Jeff feels he is making a big difference to the business. Oh and Jeff went on a trip that no-one else wanted to go on and he came back with a load of, erm jelly scoops.

As part of work at the miracle world of jelly people get jelly moulds to try out. Jeff got his job because he wrote about jelly moulds so well that he was placed higher in google than the miracle world of jelly.

When the time came were people could put in their requests for a jelly mould Jeff got very excited and asked for his dream jelly mould. A new version of it had just been released, and considering he got the job due to writing about this jelly mould he thought he had a reasonable chance of getting it. Or if not that jelly mould, probably one a bit like it. Something exciting that young chaps like Jeff like to use.

This didn't happen. Someone else, who has been at the company slightly less time than Jeff got the dream jelly mould and Jeff got given an. Well. Jeff has actually tried out this jelly mould, he tried it out last year and that it was awful. It's a sort of experimental jelly mould and it doesn't work and it's boring to use. It's as if someone had tried to design a jelly mould that has all the fun things about making jelly removed. It's useless to Jeff, worse it will be a liability to have around.

Jeff is very pissed off now. While he knows that he is lucky to even have the chance of a jelly mould he feels that he hasn't done well out of the one he has been assigned and he is so stressed about it (he has been looking forward to jelly mould day for months) that he can't sleep.

Jeff just wanted to share that with you and now he will probably be able to get some sleep. Tomorrow he is going to have a chat about seeing if he can get a different jelly mould, which is probably fairly unlikely.